Relationship Questions

[RainbowJingles]

A mentor is usually better than a friend for these things.  Even though you're no longer in the youth group, your youth pastor would likely be willing to at least listen to you and pray for you.

[Cody P]

I dont feel real comfortable talking to him about it. My mentor is now a pastor at another upc church and I can never get in touch with him. Would you like to help me?lol

[RainbowJingles]

It's probably best to find someone that you know well in real life who is the same gender.  I'd strike out on all counts!  :-)  I will keep you in prayer, though.  I pray that you will find someone that you can trust who will help you.

[Cody P]

I understand. And thanks for praying for me I greatly appreciate it.

[WhySoSerious]

I was looking back on the first page and matthew 19:12 was posted. I thought I would share this translation cause i think it puts that verse in a more perfect way.

Matthew 19:11-12 (Message)
But Jesus said, "Not everyone is mature enough to live a married life. It requires a certain aptitude and grace. Marriage isn't for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought. Others never get asked—or accepted. And some decide not to get married for kingdom reasons. But if you're capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it."

I think that paraphrase says it the best.

[Cody P]

Thank you.

[Backseat Radio]

That paraphrase brings out some interesting points but also seems to very much go against what Paul writes in 1 Corinthians chapter 7 encouraging single men and women not to get married.  The way I hear that particular paraphrase it makes it sound as if the one that doesn't get married is inferior to the one that gets married.

[Newsman]

Lady Tia,

   What translation is that? Not attacking you, but I do NOT like that translation of that passage.


John 

[TRAV]

That paraphrase brings out some interesting points but also seems to very much go against what Paul writes in 1 Corinthians chapter 7 encouraging single men and women not to get married.  The way I hear that particular paraphrase it makes it sound as if the one that doesn't get married is inferior to the one that gets married.

Reminds me of this idea:

http://godplace.com/forum/index.php?topic=26611.0

[Called_&_chosen]

I am trying to live for the lord day after day. But sometimes I feel like a hipocrit because I ask him to forgive me for the wrong things I done and then the next day I turn around and do the same thing again. I really need help.

  If I may say a word on this.


   you need to live in your Victory, if you have truely repented God does not know what you are talking about when you keep repeating I am sorry for....... thy have been cast into the sea of forgetfulness.. But if you are having trouble not doing the things you just repented of it may have something to do with your environment,
your fiends your every day route ten is there a way of not doing the things your friends are doing....that is if it is your friends that are influencing you......If i can say this
your victory can be hindered by you if you don't make changes in you life if you need to end a relationship or stop doing something or saying things than do it and YES i know it is easer said than done but  if that is what you need to do DO IT. 

as to your original question.

  Just be your self
   Don't go to church just to meet Miss RIGHT   
  Keep your options open DON'T steal for second best you can get the BEST
Worship like you have never worshiped before
Cry in the alter be the first one down and be the last one up be committed to God and prayer
If you become what God wants you will get what you want
above all just PRAY.... seek God ask him to make HIS will the desires of your heart ...it says in the Bible that He will give you the desires of your heart so ASK and it shall be given unto you seek and ye shall find.......   

[WhySoSerious]

1 Corinthians 7 (The Message)
To Be Married, to Be Single . . .
1 Now, getting down to the questions you asked in your letter to me. First, Is it a good thing to have sexual relations? 2-6Certainly—but only within a certain context. It's good for a man to have a wife, and for a woman to have a husband. Sexual drives are strong, but marriage is strong enough to contain them and provide for a balanced and fulfilling sexual life in a world of sexual disorder. The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. Abstaining from sex is permissible for a period of time if you both agree to it, and if it's for the purposes of prayer and fasting—but only for such times. Then come back together again. Satan has an ingenious way of tempting us when we least expect it. I'm not, understand, commanding these periods of abstinence—only providing my best counsel if you should choose them. 7Sometimes I wish everyone were single like me—a simpler life in many ways! But celibacy is not for everyone any more than marriage is. God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others.
8-9I do, though, tell the unmarried and widows that singleness might well be the best thing for them, as it has been for me. But if they can't manage their desires and emotions, they should by all means go ahead and get married. The difficulties of marriage are preferable by far to a sexually tortured life as a single.

10-11And if you are married, stay married. This is the Master's command, not mine. If a wife should leave her husband, she must either remain single or else come back and make things right with him. And a husband has no right to get rid of his wife.

12-14For the rest of you who are in mixed marriages—Christian married to non-Christian—we have no explicit command from the Master. So this is what you must do. If you are a man with a wife who is not a believer but who still wants to live with you, hold on to her. If you are a woman with a husband who is not a believer but he wants to live with you, hold on to him. The unbelieving husband shares to an extent in the holiness of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is likewise touched by the holiness of her husband. Otherwise, your children would be left out; as it is, they also are included in the spiritual purposes of God.

15-16On the other hand, if the unbelieving spouse walks out, you've got to let him or her go. You don't have to hold on desperately. God has called us to make the best of it, as peacefully as we can. You never know, wife: The way you handle this might bring your husband not only back to you but to God. You never know, husband: The way you handle this might bring your wife not only back to you but to God.

17And don't be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God's place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there. God, not your marital status, defines your life. Don't think I'm being harder on you than on the others. I give this same counsel in all the churches.

18-19Were you Jewish at the time God called you? Don't try to remove the evidence. Were you non-Jewish at the time of your call? Don't become a Jew. Being Jewish isn't the point. The really important thing is obeying God's call, following his commands.

20-22Stay where you were when God called your name. Were you a slave? Slavery is no roadblock to obeying and believing. I don't mean you're stuck and can't leave. If you have a chance at freedom, go ahead and take it. I'm simply trying to point out that under your new Master you're going to experience a marvelous freedom you would never have dreamed of. On the other hand, if you were free when Christ called you, you'll experience a delightful "enslavement to God" you would never have dreamed of.

23-24All of you, slave and free both, were once held hostage in a sinful society. Then a huge sum was paid out for your ransom. So please don't, out of old habit, slip back into being or doing what everyone else tells you. Friends, stay where you were called to be. God is there. Hold the high ground with him at your side.

25-28The Master did not give explicit direction regarding virgins, but as one much experienced in the mercy of the Master and loyal to him all the way, you can trust my counsel. Because of the current pressures on us from all sides, I think it would probably be best to stay just as you are. Are you married? Stay married. Are you unmarried? Don't get married. But there's certainly no sin in getting married, whether you're a virgin or not. All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible.

29-31I do want to point out, friends, that time is of the essence. There is no time to waste, so don't complicate your lives unnecessarily. Keep it simple —in marriage, grief, joy, whatever. Even in ordinary things—your daily routines of shopping, and so on. Deal as sparingly as possible with the things the world thrusts on you. This world as you see it is on its way out.

32-35I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I'm trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.

36-38If a man has a woman friend to whom he is loyal but never intended to marry, having decided to serve God as a "single," and then changes his mind, deciding he should marry her, he should go ahead and marry. It's no sin; it's not even a "step down" from celibacy, as some say. On the other hand, if a man is comfortable in his decision for a single life in service to God and it's entirely his own conviction and not imposed on him by others, he ought to stick with it. Marriage is spiritually and morally right and not inferior to singleness in any way, although as I indicated earlier, because of the times we live in, I do have pastoral reasons for encouraging singleness.

39-40A wife must stay with her husband as long as he lives. If he dies, she is free to marry anyone she chooses. She will, of course, want to marry a believer and have the blessing of the Master. By now you know that I think she'll be better off staying single. The Master, in my opinion, thinks so, too.

[Newsman]

And, now I'm interested in what translation the above is from.


John 

[Called_&_chosen]

And, now I'm interested in what translation the above is from.


John 

"The Message"  is the translation that that last portion of scripture is from

[SippinTea]

"The Message" isn't a true translation.... it's a paraphrase.

[newkris]

i love reading The Message.  it reads like a story.  although,  because it's a paraphrase, it isn't always "technically" correct.  it gives the feel of the words and i like that.  kjv is still my favorite, though, when i'm praying.  something about the traditional language that's comforting to my spirit. 

now we have gotten totally off topic.   

[RainbowJingles]

1 Corinthians 7 (The Message)
To Be Married, to Be Single . . .

Noted from above

[Cody P]

I can't believe how many post this topic is getting.

[TRAV]

Dood! Maybe this is one of the cool skills to help you find a cool girl!

"Girls like guys with forum thread skills !!!" - TRAV Dynamite

[Cody P]

lol yea if that is the case where is all the ladies at? lol jk.

[Sis]

Dood! Maybe this is one of the cool skills to help you find a cool girl!

"Girls like guys with forum thread skills !!!" - TRAV Dynamite

[Kyle]

To bring us back on topic.  There are some things that I've noticed among Apostolics:

- If your not 18 and have a g/f or a b/f something is wrong.
- If your an Apostolic girl or guy and not married by the time your 18, something is wrong.
- If your single after 18, there is no hope for you, your condemned to a life of singleness.

This is all tongue in cheek of course

[WhySoSerious]

Hat, that is some good stuff there. Yeah, that seems to be the thinking that if your not married by at least 18 your never going to marry. I am always told by people here at church it is better to be single wishing you were married, then to be married wishing you were single.

[Cody P]

I sure hope so. lol  I know for a fact there is a woman out there God wants me with he just hasnt put her in my life yet.

[WhySoSerious]

I am sure this is used over and over. In sermon on the mount Jesus said to not be worried about the daily concerns of life such as food and clothing. Yet rather to be focus on the Kingdom of God and seeking his righteousness and he would supply the rest. I think that is the key to it all, he warns us not to get all caught up in the cares of life which relationships is one who am I going to marry and what not. 

[Sis]

To bring us back on topic.  There are some things that I've noticed among Apostolics:

- If your not 18 and have a g/f or a b/f something is wrong.
- If your an Apostolic girl or guy and not married by the time your 18, something is wrong.
- If your single after 18, there is no hope for you, your condemned to a life of singleness.

This is all tongue in cheek of course

Tongue in cheek but true............ maybe even true of most of society.