June Investigations

[Newsman]

   The bachelors are dropping like flies around the website, becoming stuck to the flypaper of relationships with the honey of love.

   First, we have Chris, who passed from the bachelor coil and the ranks of the Elder Bachelor Council this past week. Even though he has left the august (in his case May) ranks of the Order, I wish him and his bride well.

   Next, we follow the sad? pending demise of two men who in the past months boldly proclaimed themselves as the 'Founding Bachelors'. It appears that, instead of finding the sweetness of dessert care packages in  their future, they have deserted that duty for sweets will be in the form of more tangible ladies they have become enamoured of. Indeed, we already have a date for the scheduled passing of Yoop, and expect the other of their short-lived Order to move along not many months hence.

   However, there is more than 'just' the passing of three at least somewhat dedicated bachelors..the Chicken King, Seth, has described the angush he feels at the competition his Queen Mel is giving Lady Chel for his "undying affections" as he himself put it.

   A longtime radio man, I would think a song Seth might relate to in this predicament is one that was popular in the late 1970's, and here is the link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w1F5BLLFAeM

   Lady Nelle seems to have found a different tone from her usual DWM (Drama With Men). We can only wish her well, and point out her boyfrend is a very fotunate man.

   Lady JennJenn is sporting a new do in her avatar pic: is this a style she has moved to so that she can even more captivate some aspiring beau? Stay tuned to these investigations.

   Rest assured, though these are indeed perilous times for the dedicated bachelor, that your mild-mannered correspondent remains committed to being a spokesman for the single man, investigating the guilty or potentially so, and accepting any sweet treats that have formerly been sent to the soon-to-be defunct Founding Bachelors order.

   Next time on June Investigations, we will delve into the topic of the Princess Approved Pink Miata!


I Remain,
John 
Grumpyest of the Grumpye
Champion of the Elder Bachelors Council
Innocent Bachelor of Broadcasting

[mini]

The pink Miata....lol

[YooperYankDude]

   Next time on June Investigations, we will delve into the topic of the Princess Approved Pink Miata!

Good job!

[Roscoe]

   Next time on June Investigations, we will delve into the topic of the Princess Approved Pink Miata!

Good job!

  THIS IS PINK
This is not!

[Mountain Dew]

OOOOOOOOOKKKKAAAAAYYY! SOOOoooooo.....who are the bachelors still available with whom to flirt?

[Tricia Lea]

hey Mountain Dew

[Mountain Dew]

  Sounds like they are just dropping like flies. *waves at Tricia*

[mini]

John and Seth are still 'round.

[Mountain Dew]

Wheeeeewwwww....*wipes sweat of relief*

[Newsman]

Welcome back, Lady Alana!

You may have come back in the nick of time, if in fact you are not already too late! Seth has become increasingly distracted by Ladies Chel and Mel (Chel/Mel?) and has swayed in his devotion to you.

Of course, any man you decided to flirt with would be an exceptionally fortunate one

In the interest of fairness, we should point out Isaac is still siingle, also (Psalm 97)


John 

[Lynx]

One would think a newsman would have learned discretion, the ability to discern what should be told and what should not be told.  Don't tell everything you know Newsman... 

[Newsman]

??

[Newsman]

As promised, we now look into a topic that has caused considerable conversation, extensive disagreement, and yet has Not been resolved.

No, I'm not taliking about
+Alana/Chel/Mel for Seth
+Whether the Society of Board/Bored Engineers will file for a restaining order against Isaac for spending too much time with sound boards without being a union member
+What names Minnie and his Chellebelle will pick for their next children
+Exactly how large in number the Ringo Circus will one day become
+What stunts may be pulled in the first week of August in Wisconsiin

Nay, we take up a topic fraught with peril and danger, one that has caused a heavily armed Arkansas Capital Trooper to repreatedly use the   smiley: the Princess Approved Pink Miata.

The phrase is made up of four words, 'princess' and 'approved' each having eight letters, 'pink' havng four, and 'miata' having five, to total 25 letters.

Oh, Five-oh, tell me honestly if you can challenge the following logic;

'Princess' relates to your adoable little girl Chey
'Miata' refers to the car you often drive, sometimes with her accompanying you.
"Approved' just after 'Princess' means that the Princess approves of your car.
You agree so far?

Thus, three of the four words in the phrase are undeniably cirrect. That means at least 75%, which means the entirety of the phrase is subtsantially ciorrect, no matter what you think of the other word in the phrase.

If you go on a letters basis, 'princess', 'approved' and 'miata' total 21 of the total of 25 letetrs in the phrase. 21 iof 25, not counting in the disputed letters, makes for at least an 84% accuracy rate.

BOTH those percentages far surpass the numbers the former President from your state was elected by!

QED: Princess Approved Pink Miata is a valid phrase for your car!


John 

[Lynx]

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

[Nelle]

I indeed have changed my tone, tune, everything.. Haha

[Newsman]

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

[Amelia Bedelia]

Glad to see you're keeping on these crafty, romancing GPers of late, Sir John   

[Roscoe]

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

First of all, thanks to Isaac for pointing out the obvious- that the photographic proof I have presented of the Miata plainly renders your case unprosecutable and shows it to be what it is- a frame up job. A spectactular one, but a frame-up nonetheless.

And props to you Sir John,  both for using the most circular logic I have ever seen (fuzzy math, anyone?) and for bringing up the fact that a president I personally disliked and tried to hide the fact that he was from Arkansas.

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

And by this reasoning, John, YOU standed convicted from the Investigation of the Investigator thread- a thread that I might remind you that you never fully responded too, perhaps because you knew that there was nothing but truth to be found in my investigation. What's tha matter, you scared? 

[MelodyB]

This is great!

As usual.

[YooperYankDude]

This is great!

As usual.

Hush! *Kicks the Queen off her feet onto her royal bo-hunkus!*

[RainbowJingles]

Yup.  Them thar foundin' bachelors is droppin' like flies. 

[Newsman]

Ah, my friend, you just torpedoed your own so-called 'case' against me. Why? Because doubt is not reasonable, and thus there is nothing beyond 'reasonable doubt'    bwahahahahahahaha!!!


John 

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

First of all, thanks to Isaac for pointing out the obvious- that the photographic proof I have presented of the Miata plainly renders your case unprosecutable and shows it to be what it is- a frame up job. A spectactular one, but a frame-up nonetheless.

And props to you Sir John,  both for using the most circular logic I have ever seen (fuzzy math, anyone?) and for bringing up the fact that a president I personally disliked and tried to hide the fact that he was from Arkansas.

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

And by this reasoning, John, YOU standed convicted from the Investigation of the Investigator thread- a thread that I might remind you that you never fully responded too, perhaps because you knew that there was nothing but truth to be found in my investigation. What's tha matter, you scared? 

[taco_harvell]

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

First of all, thanks to Isaac for pointing out the obvious- that the photographic proof I have presented of the Miata plainly renders your case unprosecutable and shows it to be what it is- a frame up job. A spectactular one, but a frame-up nonetheless.

And props to you Sir John,  both for using the most circular logic I have ever seen (fuzzy math, anyone?) and for bringing up the fact that a president I personally disliked and tried to hide the fact that he was from Arkansas.

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

And by this reasoning, John, YOU standed convicted from the Investigation of the Investigator thread- a thread that I might remind you that you never fully responded too, perhaps because you knew that there was nothing but truth to be found in my investigation. What's tha matter, you scared? 

How do we know the picture is of your Miata? It could be some other girls.... opps persons Miata. There is reasonable doubt concerning your so called evidence. You have repeatedly joked yourself about the said Miata being pink. One time going as far as to say it had a "hot pink" interior. Therefore with the burden of proof almost fully met by the investigator we must logically say he is correct in saying "Five-Oh drives a princess approved pink Miata".

[Roscoe]

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

First of all, thanks to Isaac for pointing out the obvious- that the photographic proof I have presented of the Miata plainly renders your case unprosecutable and shows it to be what it is- a frame up job. A spectactular one, but a frame-up nonetheless.

And props to you Sir John,  both for using the most circular logic I have ever seen (fuzzy math, anyone?) and for bringing up the fact that a president I personally disliked and tried to hide the fact that he was from Arkansas.

Five-oh works in a field that allows him to act on 'probable cause' without 100% certainty, so he should be familiar with the concept!

And, should a case go to trial, all the prosecution has to prove it is 'beyond a reasonable' doubt..not 100%!


John 

Veracity requires 100%.  I can't go to the bank and have them give me $25 change for a 20 because that's close enough. 

And it's NOT pink!  That drops the veracity of said statement below 100%, which makes it invalid.

(Yes I know it's not my miata and not my business.  But I gotta take up for my bro.)

And by this reasoning, John, YOU standed convicted from the Investigation of the Investigator thread- a thread that I might remind you that you never fully responded too, perhaps because you knew that there was nothing but truth to be found in my investigation. What's tha matter, you scared? 

How do we know the picture is of your Miata? It could be some other girls.... opps persons Miata. There is reasonable doubt concerning your so called evidence. You have repeatedly joked yourself about the said Miata being pink. One time going as far as to say it had a "hot pink" interior. Therefore with the burden of proof almost fully met by the investigator we must logically say he is correct in saying "Five-Oh drives a princess approved pink Miata".

Traitor! May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits. May the bird of paradise fly up your nose. May you live in interesting times.....

[upcchris]

  I've found another Discworld fan!