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Should a guy actually ask a girl to date him?

Started by sunlight, August 30, 2008, 12:02:37 AM

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I ran into this issue a few times lately from a few friends of mine...  What do you think?

yes, how else will she know that is what he has in mind without assuming things?
no, she should be able to tell by the way he acts
It dosent matter either way, it's not important to me
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Newsman

#125
February 14, 2010, 01:46:46 PM
Yep,

G. You ask her out, you enjoy it, she enjoys it, you fall head over heels and boots for each other, THEN see how much complcation there is!  :P


John  :waving:

1legRooster

#126
February 14, 2010, 02:19:21 PM
LOL, John has it right, a guy should take the risk, ask her out, and see what happens.

Don't worry Rainbow I would not use the caveman approach on anyone.  I just thought the post was funny.
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

YooperYankDude

#127
February 14, 2010, 02:38:16 PM
I am of the persuasion that asking her is the best way, you'd never know if you didn't try...

Question is... how long should a guy wait, and what signs should he look for? Is there a universal sign of gals that they are interested in a guy... we guys really have the hard jobs... lol... (just kidding ladies... *ducks to get away from charging females shouting about something to do with childbirth*... lol)

I mean... even if you been best friends with her for a super long time, and are fairly sure.. there is always a chance she could say no... right?

If there was a sign that she liked the guy, that all guys could recognize instead of each one having a different one... life could be much simpler, and fit easier into a guys  boxed mind frame...

1legRooster

#128
February 14, 2010, 03:03:15 PM
And girl's say that they are not complicated.

But there can be some fun in the finding out. 

If you are that good of friends with a young lady, you just got to ask her, something like, what would you think of going out on a date. 

Then if she says No, you can always cover with, well just wanted to be sure we were on the same page.

LOL, like that would ever work.
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

SippinTea

#129
February 14, 2010, 03:47:39 PM
Haha! Nooo, it certainly would NOT work, Jon. *snicker* But I'll have to admit that's a better one than some I've heard. At least you'd make her laugh. ;)

:beret:
"Going somewhere means leaving somewhere. Choosing something means choosing against other things. Gaining something means losing something else. And between the old and new--the 'was' and the 'not yet'--there exists only one thing: a very frightening journey called faith."
--taken from the book Coming Up For Air

1legRooster

#130
February 14, 2010, 03:58:11 PM
Ruby, getting her to laugh is always a good thing.   :cool:
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

SippinTea

#131
February 14, 2010, 04:10:50 PM
Even more than you probably realize... *smile*

:beret:
"Going somewhere means leaving somewhere. Choosing something means choosing against other things. Gaining something means losing something else. And between the old and new--the 'was' and the 'not yet'--there exists only one thing: a very frightening journey called faith."
--taken from the book Coming Up For Air

YooperYankDude

#132
February 14, 2010, 04:12:48 PM
Yeah, but sometime even if you had a time picked out to meet up and hang out... it could be considered a date right? Like when the guy brings her flowers, and then while they're driving, she almost stops the car and comments on how pretty some flowers are...

... so he risks life and limb to jump out of a almost stopped car to pick her some. I mean this guy was giving major hints... and she was kinda hinting back, but then all of a sudden when asked if it qualified as a date, and he gets slammed with a "no, we're just friends..."...

I mean, come on ladies... don't make us beg for one... lol... flirting maybe fun, but it can lead to improper assumptions (happened a long time ago to a guy I once knew... lol)...

Hence why to always ask for the date first!

1legRooster

#133
February 14, 2010, 04:20:34 PM
Yea, if you do not identify it as a date prior, it is a little hard to name it a date after.  LOL

:sadbounce:
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

YooperYankDude

#134
February 14, 2010, 04:25:51 PM
But it had all the makings of a date... flowers, car ride... sitting by a nice pretty lake... and lots of laughter... or so he thought... lol

Aren't impromptu dates an option...?

1legRooster

#135
February 14, 2010, 04:30:34 PM
They should be, but Women make those rules, and you know the basic rules of women right?

1. All rules are subject to change from second to second depending on the mind set and viewpoints of the woman involved. 
2. A woman is always right, if you mistakenly believe that a woman is incorrect, it is probably because you have not considered rule #1.

:laughhard:
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

YooperYankDude

#136
February 14, 2010, 04:32:41 PM
Quote from: 1legRooster on February 14, 2010, 04:30:34 PM
They should be, but Women make those rules, and you know the basic rules of women right?

1. All rules are subject to change from second to second depending on the mind set and viewpoints of the woman involved. 
2. A woman is always right, if you mistakenly believe that a woman is incorrect, it is probably because you have not considered rule #1.

:laughhard:

LOL... too funny... Well, and you know how to change a woman's mind right???

1legRooster

#137
February 14, 2010, 04:33:37 PM
I should add that I think woman is one of God's greatest creations.  A woman has a wonderful way of leading a man to prayer.  Praying for understanding, praising God for such a wonderful gift, asking what we did to end up with her in our lives, thanking God that she is in our life.

Oh the joy and terror.  LOL
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

1legRooster

#138
February 14, 2010, 04:34:24 PM
Quote from: YooperYankDude on February 14, 2010, 04:32:41 PM
LOL... too funny... Well, and you know how to change a woman's mind right???

Not sure, is it wait 5 minutes?

JK

:couch:
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

YooperYankDude

#139
February 14, 2010, 04:58:53 PM
I think that is one of the answers... but I just wanted to type the question... lol.

But really... A woman adds a lot to a man. God put Eve there as a help-meet to Adam... we might still be in the garden if she hadn't of listened to a snake offering a pretty apple, but that is besides the point... (LOL... just kiddin...)

But really Ladies... if a snake offers you an apple... DONT TAKE IT! *Step away from the talking snake... refuse the apple!*

SippinTea

#140
February 14, 2010, 05:02:29 PM
*is amused watching the guys dissect women*

Okay, seriously... you two seem to be able to poke fun without being mean. Thanks. :)

:beret:
"Going somewhere means leaving somewhere. Choosing something means choosing against other things. Gaining something means losing something else. And between the old and new--the 'was' and the 'not yet'--there exists only one thing: a very frightening journey called faith."
--taken from the book Coming Up For Air

1legRooster

#141
February 14, 2010, 05:04:44 PM
All my jokes are in fun, Women are great.

Yooper, one thing to keep in mind, if God did not make Eve, Adam would be the only one in the Garden, we would not be here.  So regardless of the Tree issue, Women are important. 
The early bird get's the worm, but who wants to eat a worm.

YooperYankDude

#142
February 14, 2010, 05:07:48 PM
Hey.. i hope i read that the way you meant it... I am not trying to be mean...

Adam didn't have to eat the fruit too... I think he ate it cause he knew what was gonna happen to the woman he loved, and rather than be separated from her, he would rather be with her in whatever future that may have been...

A woman can / should (and better if married to her) hold a special place in the heart of a man.

She, next to God, is his confidence. She can build or tear down his very fragile ego with just one word... or look, or even action.

Men are just little boys who got bigger... little boys love the attention of their mom's, and the acceptance of her, and her appreciation... Men are the same way... only with their wives...

iridiscente

#143
February 14, 2010, 08:57:18 PM
* iridiscente thinks the poll should be altered to have a "cookie" option.

YooperYankDude

#144
February 15, 2010, 12:12:40 AM
Quote from: iridiscente on February 14, 2010, 08:57:18 PM
* iridiscente thinks the poll should be altered to have a "cookie" option.

What kind of cookie... you can tell a lot about a person by which kind of cookie they suggest be eaten...!

iridiscente

#145
February 15, 2010, 12:55:20 AM
Chocolate chip is the only option. :P

YooperYankDude

#146
February 15, 2010, 01:12:04 AM
It's really always a either or with you huh? Either your way or highway... lol...


***thinking of a song about the either or gal***

upcchris

#147
February 15, 2010, 01:40:04 AM
Be flexible: Double choc-chip fudge is always another option :P...though it depends on your mood....and how much you like chocolate...me...not a huge fan.

*grin* I receieved an email a while back about keeping women happy...it was outrageous and hilarious....I'll post it in a thread after I've edited it a little bit (to remove some inappropriate stuff)

Yeah....make sure the girl knows it's a date...otherwise she'll just assume it's to just hang out as friends...especially if it's after church and you go to the same place everyone else has gone to fellowship.

Years ago, a complete stranger asked me to have a coffee...I saw it as an opportunity to witness to him...didn't even think it might be considered a date...I was just there to tell him about God, and to have a coffee with an acquaintance. I invited him to church...he came once and then, never since.


Television is proof the people will look at anything rather than eachother

Life would be so much easier without hormones

Of all God's creations, humans are the only ones with enough imagination to be bored

Humans are fallible, and they unreasonably expect everyone else not to be

Tina~Chris

Amelia Bedelia

#148
February 15, 2010, 02:59:02 AM
Quote from: YooperYankDude on February 14, 2010, 04:25:51 PM
But it had all the makings of a date... flowers, car ride... sitting by a nice pretty lake... and lots of laughter... or so he thought... lol

Aren't impromptu dates an option...?
They are fantastic... but only if the girl wants it to be a date.  Right idea, wrong girl.  Depending on the timing, springing a romantic date can scare a girl


Signals are bad, blunt honesty is good assuming all involved are emotionally mature adults.  Anytime someone mentions hints and signals I think of this quote (emphasis added):
Quote"If a man is offered a fact which goes against his instincts, he will scrutinize it closely, and unless the evidence is overwhelming, he will refuse to believe it. If, on the other hand, he is offered something which affords a reason for acting in accordance to his instincts, he will accept it even on the slightest evidence. The origin of myths is explained in this way."
  - Bertrand Russell

I've had guys not comprehend that when I said I wasn't interested, it meant I wasn't interested and that no, I did not want to do anything with him and it was merely a platonic arms-length friendship.  I hate having to not be friendly and sometimes downright nasty simply because I'm worried the guy is going to assault me because I smiled at him and was a good listener.   

Women are confusing and flaky, guys are stubborn and dense  :P

YooperYankDude

#149
February 15, 2010, 03:39:47 AM
It is good when a girl can actually tell the guy she is not interested... just like the guy should be able to tell the girl, that he is not interested... but does this always happen?

If she tells him, no interest... than the dude should back off... but what if she says that and then still acts as though he belongs to her... even though she rejected his advances... the whole " I don't want him, but don't want anyone else to have him" syndrome...

Are there times when two friends, who for all intents and purposes, both feel like there could be something going on, but both two scared to mention it for fear of rejection?

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