Define Flirting

[SippinTea]

  Thanks, Sis. I needed that.

[RainbowJingles]

*laughs with Ruby*



You're a nutcase, Sis!

[newkris]

amanda and sis, both honest reflections.

my scouthood will remian undisclosed.  (although . . . since my kids don't spy on me here . . i could say whatever i want . . .  )

[Mrs. Yosemite]

Comments of Dr. Mz. Yosemite. 

I dont know if my post will have anything much to do with your question .lol But I was just reading anyway.
Figured I'd throw my 2 cents in.  I know what you mean about guys thinking you are flirting.

I realized early in my teens that some guys/girls have a terribly high opinion of themselves or EGO if you will. Some think everybody they talk to just wants to wrap them up and take'em home. lol  I've seen those who were a terribly conceited.

The older I get the more fun it is talking to guys. lol (Dont ya'll git it wrong, I dont flirt around on my man) but getting older, I've learned more how to pick up on what people are  assuming.  Some guy's tend to flirt with married women the most, thats why I can post this. haha

When a guy does talk to me, or I get a suspicion that somebody is flirting with me, whether online or in person, I just say exactly what I think.  Now that I'm married and not concerned whether another man is impressed with me or not, Most of the time everything comes out hillarious to the person who wasnt expecting it!  If you already like to clown around, you have got some fun times ahead! 

I guess when I was single, I was too caught up in trying to make a good impression. I wasn't really myself. I was shy and backwards and always worried about my hair or a zit. Now that I'm older,  I don't really concern myself too much of what others think. I wish I had've just been comfortable all along. I could've had more fun in my teens. 

When I got comfortable just being my kookie self and stopped worrying about my hair & looks & hips, and whether some guy thought I was flirting or not... 

I ended up marrying the KOOLEST guy!  It took me till I was 35 to find somebody I thought I could stand living with, but it was worth the wait.  He's just as insane as I am! We laugh all the time. We can even burp & stuff in front of each other. (NOW THATS LUVVVV!) We can finish each other's sentences and sometimes say the exact same thing and the same time. 

Being comfortable and not worrying about impressions, I started attracting guys who were more my type.  I think the same thing applies to men looking for women. I got me a good'un! Sorry ya'll single girls have to settle for what's left. 

I hope my post was helpful to someone.

[RainbowJingles]

Cool!  There IS still hope!  Of course, I turn 36 in August, so...    Not much time left.  lol

[sunlight]

When a guy does talk to me, or I get a suspicion that somebody is flirting with me, whether online or in person, I just say exactly what I think.  Now that I'm married and not concerned whether another man is impressed with me or not, Most of the time everything comes out hillarious to the person who wasnt expecting it!  If you already like to clown around, you have got some fun times ahead! 

haha! I'm single and i already do this! hehe! It does suprise some people.... but its a trait i got from my mom... lol!

We can even burp & stuff in front of each other.

sigh, too cool, maybe one day someone wont be scared off by my burp...

[Mrs. Yosemite]

Cool!  There IS still hope!  Of course, I turn 36 in August, so...    Not much time left.  lol

Well I made Yosemite wait 5 years before I married him. I was gonna make sure I was planning my picnic on a good weather day. haha We married two days before I turned 40. So you got plenty of time!! I think the longer you wait the better spouse you'll have. I think women in their 30's and 40's are more sure of what they want and what they DO NOT WANT.  Usually end up choosing a better spouse.

[RainbowJingles]

I DO know what I DON'T want now.  lol  *nod*  That's for SURE.  As to what I DO want now...  The jury is still out on a few things.  We'll see what GOD wants.  I often find myself kind of throwing my hands up in the air and saying, "Lord, YOU decide!"  lol  I think He'll pick a good one.

Maybe I *DO* believe in "arranged marriages" after all.  :-)

[Mrs. Yosemite]

well if you do burp and he says, "Thats my girl!" You'll know you've arrived. hahaha  Just Kidding. You will have gotten yourself a genuine redneck.

[Sis]

well if you do burp and he says, "Thats my girl!" You'll know you've arrived. hahaha  Just Kidding. You will have gotten yourself a genuine redneck.

  Girl, you're making me laugh out loud and Stevebert thinks I've lost my mind. That's ok I only had half of one when we met. LOL

[apsurf]

When a guy does talk to me, or I get a suspicion that somebody is flirting with me, whether online or in person, I just say exactly what I think.  Now that I'm married and not concerned whether another man is impressed with me or not, Most of the time everything comes out hillarious to the person who wasnt expecting it!  If you already like to clown around, you have got some fun times ahead! 

haha! I'm single and i already do this! hehe! It does suprise some people.... but its a trait i got from my mom... lol!

We can even burp & stuff in front of each other.

sigh, too cool, maybe one day someone wont be scared off by my burp...

hmmm.....I wonder  *gets out the video recorder*

[Mrs. Yosemite]

I like your avatar nwlife.

On another subject that doesnt really go with this thread.  I know I'm probably not suppose to be on this thread since I'm married.  But I get a kick out of reading stuff ya'll post!  I like thinking back on the stuff I went thru when I was single and reading about your ordeals.

I dont have all the answers, but I can remember some things I could've done differently.
I was wondering about all of you single ladies, if you had been thru this ordeal that I am about mention.  It was something I used to deal with alot before I met my husband.

Think of how many times you've met a guy you think is kinda cute; thought it might be a potential good date so you give him your number. (You already know he was interested or he wouldnt have asked for your number.) 

And before the end of the week, he has called more than two or three times. He calls and text you and just 'worries the horns off of a billygoat'.   He seems needy and clingy without a life of his own. You feel turned off and wish you hadnt gave him your number. And you think, hmmm there he/she is again. I'll just let it ring.

Thats just something I went thru when I was single.  Just wondering how many of you single folks have been there and done that.  I knew this girl who kept calling her boyfriend and I thought to myself,  man that has got to be driving him crazy. 

[UPC_gurl_4_God]

I don't post here often..but i love this topic.

I know about this clingy thing..I have a friend who dated this guy, and she called him a billion times a day.  All i could think is, "how in the world could they still have something to talk about?"  They broke up after 3 months.  I think they ran out of things to say.  I stay with my Grandma a lot...She always says that girls should never call guys.  She says it's they guys place to call the girls.  But i'm the type that is very straight foward.  If I have something to say, I just say it.  If i need to call a guy, then I just do it.  If iI like a guy, I just tell him.  Also, I'm not really good with flirting.  I try to flirt sometimes, but I just feel stupid when i try to act like the flirty girl.  But i'm also very picky about the guys I chose to date.  If I like a guy, everything just comes very very natural when i'm with him.  But i'm only 19.  I'm not looking for someone to settle down with.

[Mrs. Yosemite]

My grandma always told me I should never call a guy too. While I dont think there is anything wrong with calling a guy maybe 'once'.  I wouldnt call him any more than I had to. You must resist the urge to call. I found out the hard way that mamaw was right.

(guys are natural born hunters and some guys have the need to feel the thrill of the chase)  but they hate girls who play "hard to get".  I think they like a girl who lets them take the lead. They want you to be genuine, settled, friendly, intelligent and so on.  Not an over eager, jabbering, giggling hiena that I've seen girls do.

When I was 18, I remember falling head over heels with a guy named Paul.  I mean, I had it so bad I wouldve ate a bug to get his attention! He finally came around and asked me for my number. We went out, had a great time. He wanted to go out again.

A couple days rocked on and I didnt hear from him. I started to panic. ( NEVER GET IN A HURRY) So I called him and his mom said he wasnt home. So I called later that evening. He seemed to be in a hurry to go.  Well needless to say, Paul didnt seem to have much interest afterall. And I didnt do anything. Just call.

I decided to take Mamaw's advice. When I met the guy I am married to now, We swapped numbers and I absolutely resisted the urge to call him. It almost killed me, but I did not pick the phone up not one time. When you want the guy to call so bad, it seems like a miserable eternity. But you must resist. 

Never grab the phone up on the first ring. You don't want him to know that he was so almighty important that you were sitting around waiting for him. Never talk about your ex's, or gossip about other girls, or go into drama.
Keep him talking about himself.

Each time he called I was really nice and glad to hear from him. When we hung up. I threw the ball back in his court. This went on for about 2 or 3 weeks. By that time, it was a green light! I felt that it was ok to call him.

If you call them and they seem in a hurry, you wind up getting your feelings hurt and read too far into it. When you wait for them to call you, you know that he has made time to talk to you and is thinking about you. But dont stay on the phone too long. Always leave him wanting more. You want your voice to be music to his ears.

Once you get him 'reeled in' , he'll be hooked. Then you can call him when you want without scaring him off. This was what your grandmother probably meant.

If its just a guy you like for a friend only, I'd say it's alright to call him.

If a man you like is worried over the fact that you haven't called. It's a good thing.  It's good for them to WORRY a little bit. lol  Makes them that much more desperate to talk to you. After all, why should you do all the worrying?

Mrs. Yo

(It may not work on every guy, but it worked on mine. hehe ( I cant wait to see what big remark he has to say about this post)

[RainbowJingles]

Good solid advice for sure.  I've blown it more than a few times by being too "available." 
Of course, now that I look back at those guys, I'm glad I missed the "golden opportunity" with some of them.

It's strange at times, the balance you need to try to strike in order for a guy to feel comfortable enough to realize he's really interested:
Available - but not ALL the time
Interested, but not TOO interested
Busy, but not TOO busy
Emotional, but not OVERLY emotional
Dependent, but not COdependent
Independent yet weak
Fragile but strong
Beautiful yet tough




And I agree with my Mom's advice (at least most of the time).  Don't call him.  Let him call you.  Unless it's a well- established "just friends" thing, then I try to avoid just picking up the phone and calling a guy - especially if I'm interested!

Good GRIEF.  No WONDER I'm still single.  There are too many rules to the dating game!

[Mrs. Yosemite]

HA! RJ You Are A Killer !!  I know what you mean. And men fuss because women are so hard to figure out!

I remember when I first met my husband,  I didn't answer my phone a couple of times. (just to appear "not too available".  MAN, that was terrible! I must have dived  into a pack of oreos cause I was dying to answer the phone.   I waited about 2 hours and called him back, but kept it short.
My heart was pounding so bad, I must have sounded like I was jogging. I would like to ad that if you want to talk to the guy, just go ahead and answer the phone. If a guy thinks he's being 'played', that'll be the end of everything.

I thought, They aint no way Mamaw would possibly know about all of this.  I just figured that girls/guys were all different now, and all those rules only applied back in her day.

Found out it still works. Some may see it as playing mind games.  But in this new society where most girls are more straightforward,  I think guys are still looking for a woman like no other.  I dont know. I'm not a guy. My goofy advice dont count for much.

But you are hillarious!  

[zizi90]

And I agree with my Mom's advice (at least most of the time).  Don't call him.  Let him call you.  Unless it's a well- established "just friends" thing, then I try to avoid just picking up the phone and calling a guy - especially if I'm interested!

I totally agree with the don't call thing...that's what I've always believed. But if you have to call a guy (a friend, not someone you've exchanged numbers with or anything) cause you have to pass on a message, or something trivial like that, that doesn't count right?

[TRAV]

Define flirting.

ok.

When a guy says to a girl, "I'm really diggin the way that dress showcases your God given assets. And what a beautiful smile you have."

[RainbowJingles]

*curtsies*

Why, thank you, Trav.  

You're too kind.

I won't be able to call you right away, though.  You'll have to call me first, and then I might not answer.  If I *do* happen to answer, I'll be really busy and only have a minute to talk.  Or I might be talking with another "friend" of any of the three genders (is that mysterious enough, Mrs. Yo?).

[Nerd]

Or I might be talking with another "friend" of any of the three genders

Uh...

[RainbowJingles]

Remember: I live close to San Francisco, Aaron.  I've seen 'em!

[Nerd]

Yeah, better you than me. lol

Houston's bad enough.

[MelodyB]

Remember: I live close to San Francisco, Aaron.  I've seen 'em!

THAT Darlin'...was hilarious!

[yosemite]

*curtsies*
I won't be able to call you right away, though.  You'll have to call me first, and then I might not answer.  If I *do* happen to answer, I'll be really busy and only have a minute to talk.  Or I might be talking with another "friend" of any of the three genders (is that mysterious enough, Mrs. Yo?).

THats funny! But you CAN go overboard with the mysterious thing. That would be a turn off too.  People catch on to stuff like that quickly. Theres really just no way you can get it right. Only God's help.lol

I think guys try to pull the same thing when they ask for your number and then 3 or 4 days go by and they havent called.  Im glad I'm married.   I'd hate to have to go back to being single. lol I got so tired of that jigsaw puzzle. 

mrs.yo made a mistake when i wasn't signed out and got on here jabbering..LOL what was said here aint me.  thnx yo

[Sis]

Or I might be talking with another "friend" of any of the three genders

Uh...

Reminds me of a joke from grade school....

A teacher asked a little boy how many sexes there were.  He said "Three"

Teacher asked, "Three? How did you come to that number?"

The little boy said, "Well, there's the boy sex, and there's the girl sex, and there are insects!"