If You Ever Lost Him/Her...

[RainbowJingles]

Okay...  so tonight I had a *moment* with a friend.

He was in the ER with some major issues, and I just started to cry.  I realized that it scared me to think about "what if"s.  It hit me HARD that I really care about this person.

Ever had a moment like that?  When you realize that, if you lost someone, how much it would devastate you?  Not just a "wow, I hope I never lose this person," but a moment where you just lean back and cry because you're scared of the possibility?  I've felt that with some of my friends before, and it's not fun...  but yet it's a revealing moment in a friendship when you realize how much you really care about someone.

[SippinTea]

Yes. I've had at least one of those moments. And it scared the socks off me.

[nwlife]

A dear classmate that we almost lost when he had his liver transplant, then lost him a couple years later in Jr. High. 

and my cousin, we thought we had lost her, than she started to recover, but tragiclly finally passing away in the middle of the night in her sleep.   I had been so scared to lose her, and then lost her, she was in some effect, my sister---or that's how I thought of her.

But I know where they are eternally so that is alot of comfort for me, and hopefully if life goes on and straightens itself out, I will see them again in heaven.

[RainbowJingles]

That is so true.  Eternity is truly the only thought that would bring comfort at times like that, Brandon.

[Sis]

Stevebert's had a couple of close calls. What would I do?

[Amelia Bedelia]

my mother has gone through a lot and all throughout my childhood i've been aware of how fragile her life is... I used to cry a lot imagining what life would be like without her

especially when she'd play the piano and i'd lie in bed listening... I used to sob

when she was actually going through something I couldn't stop to think about it cause I was too busy making sure she got through it

its making me cry to write this, I saw her last weekend and it made me want to cry every time I hugged her... I miss her so much now and at least now she's still on the planet and I have phone contact!

I can't imagine ever having someone in my life that will impact me the same as when I lose her

everyone else i've been without for some time and did just fine... but mom? she's always been there and we've never been anything other than super close... I don't think we've ever even fought and i've always felt it my duty to take care of her

I hope God leaves her here for a long time more

[RainbowJingles]

**HUGS** Mary



For those of you who can:
Have you hugged your Mom today?

[Envelope]

I know I sometimes gripe and complain about it.........but if anything ever happened to my Identical twin sister, I'd be so lost!!  If I think about it, I cry.  I can't imagine the rest of my life looking in the mirror and seeing "her".  When she up and moved 12 hours away, it was like ripping my heart right out of my chest.

I was raised without my mom (we were 7 when my parents divorced and dad got full custody of us).  my mom was scum, but nevertheless, nothing ever quite filled that gap in my life.

the person I am closest to on this whole earth is my husband...........I can NOT imagine my life without him......or my girls.  Hannah (my youngest) was born with fluid in her lungs and was in NICU for 5 days....thankfully it was on "that bad" but I remember being SCARED to death when I heard her "grunting" during her breathing, the nurse in me kicked in and I KNEW that was NOT a good sign.....I literally trembled in fear until I KNEW she'd be ok.........

sharon

[Newsman]

I have a friend whose wife of 30+ years passed away, from her acting odd to her actual passing away being about two months.

He's functioning, but he told me a rumor he would move was false becuase something to the effect of , his better 50% was buried here.. A few weeks later, he now says he's 30% of who he was, or 25%.

Tragic. His wife had previously, as far as was known, been fine. I think he thought he'd go first.


John

[Sis]

What does this mean? She passed away from acting odd? Not kidding, I didn't understand what you meant.

I have a friend whose wife of 30+ years passed away, from her acting odd to her actual passing away being about two months.

[Amelia Bedelia]

I think he meant first signs of health problems

[CDAGeek]

This is an issue I've contemplated a lot. Because of a certain situation going on, I'm cut off completely from the person who matters most in my life short of God. It may not be as permanent as a death, but the loss is real. Those moments are scary and often life altering.

[Newsman]

She went from looking and acting normal to being dead within two months. At the onset of the visible symptoms, she acted strangely, detached, and it became hard for her to remain concentrated to do just the simplest of tasks.

She was dead in about two months from when those first visible symptoms that something was wrong became visible.. initially thought to be a tunor, it was, as far as I understand, actually cancer that got her.


John

[Melody]

I have never lost anyone that I was intensely close with as I have not been intensely close to very many people.   Salvation plays a huge part in coping I'd think.  My husband and my kids I don't know what I'd do without.  I've thought about it before and I think I'd miss them so bad I couldn't funtion for a least a time, and they're all saved.  For me, I think it would be more than just losing them, it would be losing what my purpose has been filtered through for so long.  Kind of like Mary was saying.  My life is in service to God and to my hubby and kids.  It would be more than life altering I wonder, if not needing a new life completely, almost a new you.

I have thought I'd go before my hubby.  I've never lost someone close, so I wonder if it's cause I couldn't take it.  So maybe I'd go first.

[RainbowJingles]

Perhaps what struck me when I initially creating this thread was sort of the opposite of the way the conversation seems to be going (which is quite fine; just regrouping my thoughts a bit).  My initial thought was that I hadn't really been struck by how much I cared about this person until the thought crossed my mind that something might happen to him.

There are people in my life that I know I care about greatly, and if I stop and think about losing them, I feel sad.  BUT this one kind of came out of nowhere.

Does the possibility of losing someone bring you closer together?
Does it make you recognize how much you care?
Does it bring out emotions in you that you may not have even realized existed?

[Sis]

She went from looking and acting normal to being dead within two months. At the onset of the visible symptoms, she acted strangely, detached, and it became hard for her to remain concentrated to do just the simplest of tasks.

She was dead in about two months from when those first visible symptoms that something was wrong became visible.. initially thought to be a tunor, it was, as far as I understand, actually cancer that got her.


John

Goodness! What did she die of?

[SippinTea]

She went from looking and acting normal to being dead within two months. At the onset of the visible symptoms, she acted strangely, detached, and it became hard for her to remain concentrated to do just the simplest of tasks.

She was dead in about two months from when those first visible symptoms that something was wrong became visible.. initially thought to be a tunor, it was, as far as I understand, actually cancer that got her.


John

Goodness! What did she die of?

He answered in his post, Sis.

Perhaps what struck me when I initially creating this thread was sort of the opposite of the way the conversation seems to be going (which is quite fine; just regrouping my thoughts a bit).  My initial thought was that I hadn't really been struck by how much I cared about this person until the thought crossed my mind that something might happen to him.

There are people in my life that I know I care about greatly, and if I stop and think about losing them, I feel sad.  BUT this one kind of came out of nowhere.

Does the possibility of losing someone bring you closer together?
Does it make you recognize how much you care?
Does it bring out emotions in you that you may not have even realized existed?

My moment was an epiphany of sorts. It wasn't until a particular instance that I realized just how much I did care about that individual. And it reminded me again just how fragile life and relationships truly are. I knew if they were gone that I would miss them terribly, but it wasn't until that one moment that I realized the depth of that feeling. I wandered around for several days somewhat dazed and numb... and thanking God that they were still in my life.

[RainbowJingles]

**HUGS** Ruby

[SippinTea]

*Hugs* Elona

And yes, I hug my mom often. I dare say you've made more than one person stop and think about hugging people before they're gone. It's only too easy to take that for granted, I'm afraid.

*Hugs* Elona again

[RainbowJingles]

**HUGS** the good memories

[Sis]

Not being a hugger in real life, they don't mean much to me. There are other ways to show love to those who mean a lot. Talking and telling them how much they mean to you is worth much more in my life.

The only one I like hugging is Stevebert. I do hug others sometimes, but I just want to get it over with. I guess that's what happens to a girl who grows up with only boys around. *shrug*

[sunlight]

then you have a different love language than i do. thats all there is to that!

and yes Elona... i think it definitely can make you stop and think and appreciate if you realize that there is the possibility of it just being a temporary moment rather than a lifetime.

[Sis]

I have taken to say what I'm thinking more often. More I Love You's, more doing for him, which ends up with him doing more for me. Less griping about little things. I stop to think, he's pretty good at picking up after himself, so I won't gripe about the one time he doesn't. etc.

[myhaloisintheshop]

When I was in high school and my now husband and I were just good friends he had an accident pole vaulting.  Basically--he fell on his head off the mats.   Something went through me like no other.  THAT is when I realized how much he meant to me.

Now I can't imagine him not being here and tear up thinking about something taking him from this world without warning.   Same goes for my kids.  I hear too much about young people dying and I just don't know if I could handle one of my boys passing before me. 

Just talking about it now has brought tears to my eyes.  I am thankful for them in many many ways and thankful for being open to love when from past experiences it would have been easier to put up walls and not let anyone in.

[Chseeads]

Not to dampen your tender moment, Sarba....but I just have to comment....NOW it's all clear why Cletus is the way he is...LOL