An Arkansas police officer, who's name has not been released, was shot in line off duty yesterday at a local convenience store.
Authorities report that the officer had been enjoying a leisurely drive about town on his day off when as he happened past a local convenience store, he saw the red Krispy Kreme light be turned on signifying FRESH HOT DOUGHNUTS available. The officer quickly performed an illegal U-turn, while sticking his head out the window and attempting to wail like a police car siren, and whipping his tiny pink Miata into the crowded store parking lot.
Several patrons were already lined up inside the door when the off duty officer made it to the storefront. He quickly joined the line and waited impatiently, drooling and muttering to himself, witnesses at the scene said.
The doughnuts were selling like hotcakes and moving out fast. The line slowly inched ahead, but the doughnuts were dwindling by the dozen. Witnesses say that the officer, who was clad in plain clothes overalls, but whom everyone assumed was a policeman based on his obvious infatuation with doughnuts, began to become more and more erratic in his behavior, muttering under his breath and hissing menacingly as he watched people purchase the pastries.
The scene took a terrible turn for the worse, when finally, after the tension had built to a fevered peak as only one dozen donuts was seen to be left and they were boxed up and purchased by a large woman with her hair in sponge rollers, wearing a mumu, and leading a long-haired chihuahua on a leash.
As the woman exited the store and the officer stood speechless two places back in line, with tears streaming down his cheeks, he suddenly let out a blood-curdling scream, whipped a cap gun out of the back pocket of his Big Smith's, and promptly shot himself in the temple.
He fell to the floor wailing and convulsing. Onlookers stood by in fear of what would happen next, as the store clerk called 911.
An ambulance was dispatched to the scene, and upon arrival found the officer lying still and motionless on the floor of the store with a glazed look in his eyes. After placing him on a stretcher and assessing his wounds, a piece of gauze was used to wipe the cap gun dust off his temple, and he was deemed to not be injured bad enough to merit a trip to the hospital.
The man's wife was called, and she promptly came to pick him up, wearing a paperbag on her head out of shame and for fear of being recognized by the media. :paperbag:
Authorities released the officer to the care of his wife and she took him home and sent someone back to the store later that evening to throw his pink Miata in the back of a pickup truck and haul it home.
No charges were filed.
THAT is the best one I've read so far! :thumbsup2:
John :waving:
BOL!!
hehehe
Hilarious!
:pound: :pound: :laughhard: :laughhard: Hat's off to you Cheesehead. That was funny. :P
:freaky2: