Chinese Culture

[CDAGeek]

I'm wondering if anyone can point me in the right direction on how to research Chinese culture.

I'm tenatively scheduled to go on a short term missions trip to Beijing next year, and I want to be as prepared as possible. However everything I find seems to either be a tourist guide (see this, eat here, take pictures of that...) or a description of their political standing in the world. Nothing I have found actually deals with the every day life there, customs, traditions, social taboos, manners, what's rude/what isn't...basically things I'd need to know so I don't make a complete fool of myself.

Any suggestions?

[nicolejoy]

I'm actually living in Hong Kong at the moment.... so maybe I can help you out a bit!!


Some tips:
Don't play with your chopsticks
Be "extra polite" - if someone does something nice for you, say thank you 2 or 3 times more than you normally would
You can practice spitting in the gutter if you want to be like the locals

Here are a couple of good links - most of this is pretty true...

http://www.cyborlink.com/besite/china.htm
http://www.protocolprofessionals.com/articles_china_print.htm

I hope this helps a bit!! If you need more help with anything, just PM me!! I'm married to a Chinese guy so I've got a bit of "inside knowledge" lol

[CDAGeek]

Just by looking over those sites I can already see myself making a fool of myself next year, but thank you for the help! I am sure I will be messaging you with questions as I think of them.

[nicolejoy]

The main thing to remember is in some ways, Chinese people are more "serious" - they don't make fun of each other like we would... and they're all about respecting your elders, and "giving face" (not making anyone look bad in front of other people)... A lot of it is - if you are "super polite", then you'll do just fine!!

On those sites that I gave you, some of the things are more a big deal, other things aren't so much... and often us "white people" can get away with a lot more than other people would be able to!!

Even if you did something REEEAAALLLLYYY offensive though - chances are, a Chinese person wouldn't even mention it to you... but obviously we still don't want to do that!!

When are you going to Beijing? How long for? Do you know people there? (missionaries, etc...)

[SippinTea]

There is a Youth Corp trip listed for next year... is it that, perhaps? I was eyeing it myself.   .... and dreaming.

[MelodyB]

I would so totally bomb out in China...

[nicolejoy]

There is a Youth Corp trip listed for next year... is it that, perhaps? I was eyeing it myself.   .... and dreaming.

A UPCI thing?? I should go too - it's pretty close for me!!

[MelodyB]

http://www.apostolicyouthcorps.com/#

Click Destinations...

[SippinTea]

Yup.... UPCI it is. I've been trying to figure out if I dare be gone more than a month. Because.... I couldn't possibly get all the way over there and then NOT spend a week or so with Kim and you. LOL

[nicolejoy]

It would be SOOOO AWESOME if you could come!! I'd put money towards your fundraising campaign

[SippinTea]

*laugh* The money I'd spend wouldn't be of as much concern as all that time off work!

And we've thread-jacked again. Bad us.

Back to Chinese culture....

[CDAGeek]

Yeah, it's the AYC trip in July that I'm looking at going on. 11 days in Beijing with the missionaries there.

You mentioned some stuff on those lists were very serious taboos, other stuff not so much - could you point out some examples of what the more severe rules are?

[nicolejoy]

Sorry - I haven't been on here for a while!!

Here's the "more serious" ones. Although, being white, we can get away with a lot of stuff because they know we're ignorant... but it's always better to do "more" than "not enough"!!

• 
  Always arrive on time or early if you are the guest.
• Do not start to eat or drink prior to the host.
• As a cultural courtesy, you should taste all the dishes you are offered. (Even if it's REALLY DISGUSTING!! And if your food is already put on your plate, eat it! Even if it's gross)
• Sample meals only, there may be several courses.
• Never place your chopsticks straight up in your bowl. By placing your sticks upright in your bowl your will remind your host of joss sticks which connotes death. (also, don't play drums with your chopsticks or fool around with them)
• Introductions are formal. Use formal titles. (If someone older than you introduces himself to you as "Robert Lee", call him "Mr Lee", not "Robert". If it's someone your age, first name is ok - and if they ASK you to call them by their first name, that's ok too... but generally younger people use formal language to address their elders)
• Use both hands when presenting business cards and be sure the writing faces the person to whom you are presenting your card. Cards should also be received with both hands. Do not immediately put the card in a pocket or bag-this is considered rude. (this is kind of an "optional extra" - but it's an easy way to look really polite!!)
• Bowing or nodding is the common greeting.
• Always stand up when being introduced and remain standing throughout the introductions. (if you're sitting down for dinner and someone else arrives, stand up to greet them)
• The Chinese do not like to be touched, particularly by strangers. Do not hug, back slap or put an arm around someone's shoulder.
• The Chinese usually do not open gifts at the time they receive them. When receiving gifts from the Chinese, do not open them unless they insist.

I think that those are the "main" ones. But like I said, don't stress too much about it - be aware of it, but people are pretty understanding really!!

[MelodyB]

Wow. I dont know if I could remember all that.

[nicolejoy]

A lot of it, particularly if you're at dinner, if you just "copy your host", you're safe!! And when these guys go to Beijing, they'll have the missionary family there who can be an "intermediate" for them - so it won't be too bad!!

[MelodyB]

Ah, ok....I still dont know, but thats ok, Im not planning on going over there anytime soon, so, Im safe. I can be rude here all I want.


BTW, I am at work and awake...

[Sis]

Wish I had known some of this when I met Hsio Mai's mother.

As a cultural courtesy, you should taste all the dishes you are offered. (Even if it's REALLY DISGUSTING!! And if your food is already put on your plate, eat it! Even if it's gross)

What if you're allergic to something on the table?

[nicolejoy]

Depends how allergic

just kidding Probably if you know that someone will be cooking for you or taking you out to eat, you should make sure that the host knows if you're really allergic to something - and the host generally would be very accommodating!! People over here though don't seem to have that many food allergies, and most Chinese restaurants have peanuts on the table - so I'm guessing that the peanut allergy isn't that big over here!!

[Sis]

I'm allergic to certain sea foods, and they were served to me by Hsio Mai's mother. I had to decline because I didn't want to be sick all night, nor did I want to go to the hospital. Now I wonder if she thought I was being rude. I had no idea they were serving this type of food. She said stir-fry, so I thought I'd be safe.

Do people bring their own chop sticks to someone's home when invited for dinner? I was curious because I certainly would've done it.

Hsio Mai's mother said I used them like I was born in China. LOL I felt honored.

[nicolejoy]

I would definitely tell someone in advance if I was allergic to seafood - because that is a BIG thing that they WILL buy if they are trying to impress someone... and all kinds of WEIRD seafood too!! Sometimes I WISH I was allergic to seafood

People don't bring their own chopsticks to dinner...

[Sis]

Well, I did kinda sorta bring my own chopsticks. Hsio Mai borrowed 6 pair for the dinner. LOL

[seedsower]

Take a leap of faith!! Go there unknowing ... if your truley called there it wont take you long to figure things out. Another suggestion might be to find people who have been there perhaps some retired missionaries, sit down and listen to some of thier stories. Alot of the reality of places are hardly ever writtin in books.