Arkansas Capitol Police Officer Missing: (Arkansas State Police)

[taco_harvell]

Late yesterday a group of boy scouts approached Officer Roscoe in an attempt to sell him some doughnuts, they were raising money for a trip in hopes that they could be the first people in there family to leave the state and add a real branch to the family tree. Officer Roscoe upon seeing 4 boy scouts holding 4 dozen doughnuts each just snapped. He confiscated the doughnuts ran into his booth, and authorities are not sure how but he ate 16 dozen doughnuts in under 4 minutes.

Apparently sugar is Officer Roscoe's drug of choice, said the chief investigator. After consuming 16 dozen doughnuts so quickly, the sugar was apparently to much for a person of such short stature. He came running out of the booth firing his gun into the air demanding to be inducted into the "Lollipop Kids" gang. He then began shooting into the air while singing "We represent the lollipop kids, the lollipop kids". One witness said "It was kinda cool, like meeting a real life munchkin".

Officer Roscoe then went screaming from the building screaming "I love Pink" which confused investigators until they found his Pink Miata abandoned outside. Upon investigation they also believe Officer Roscoe to be somehow connected with a weed growing operation through an online discussion forum in a neighboring state.

The investigation and search continues, authorities warn if you find a short balding man dressed like a cop passed out on the ground to contact authorities and DO NOT try to wake him. It is unknown exactly how long the affects of so much sugar may last in such a short man.

[Lynx]

It seems to be open season on five-oh this week.  I've lost count of the number of scurrilous threads about him. 

Oh well, better he than I. 

[Melody]

HA!  Those poor poor boy scouts.  They were probably his brothers too...

[mini]

Nah, thats Arkansas we is talking about, them boy scouts were probably his sisters!

[The Purple Fuzzy]