Worst marriage advice?

[titushome]

"you don't want to get stuck with someone you aren't sexually compatible with"

An acquaintance I once had shared that opinion with me.  When queried her as to the exact nature of this supposed "sexual compatibility" she seemed a bit flustered....

[Sis]

  Wonder why?

[The Purple Fuzzy]

And they wonder why STDs have spread so much...

[Niki]

I read at another forum recently where one of the posters said that it was "stupid" to get married to someone you haven't had sex with. The whole "sexual compatibility" thing. 

If you've never been with anyone else, then there's no one to compare them to (a good thing) and you can work on it together. If things don't go well the first time, big deal. As long as you both are alive and care about and respect each other, you have plenty of time to figure out what works and what doesn't.

I'm glad there's no other man out there who can say he's been with me. Some think that's no big deal or are even proud of it. I think it's embarrassing and shameful. (I'm not talking cheating ex-husbands/wives here. I'm talking about pre-marital partners.) It's sick.

[MelodyB]

Interesting what you find looking at what the guests are looking at lol

Yes it is...this was a great read!

[Tricia Lea]

ok call it being late but rereading some of the stuff here again has had me laughing my head off lol

[RandyWayne]

I see this is an older thread and I might have mentioned it already but the WORST advice I have heard, and is continually given to newly weds at our old church is that they MUST have large families.  In fact, "we are expecting to see your first born 9 months from your honeymoon".  The Dugers are lifted up as examples for ALL couples.

[Sis]

I've never heard of anyone giving that advice. Back home our pastor used to tell folks to wait a year or two and get to know each other before they even thought of having kids.

[sunlight]

I read at another forum recently where one of the posters said that it was "stupid" to get married to someone you haven't had sex with. The whole "sexual compatibility" thing. 

If you've never been with anyone else, then there's no one to compare them to (a good thing) and you can work on it together. If things don't go well the first time, big deal. As long as you both are alive and care about and respect each other, you have plenty of time to figure out what works and what doesn't.

I'm glad there's no other man out there who can say he's been with me. Some think that's no big deal or are even proud of it. I think it's embarrassing and shameful. (I'm not talking cheating ex-husbands/wives here. I'm talking about pre-marital partners.) It's sick.

This is a great post...

[Melody]

Randy I've never heard that said_ever.  That's kind of a whacko thought IMO. 

I'd love to have 4 kids, but it's not financially responsible.  We started our family early, have 2 kids that are almost 4 years apart and we are done.  When asked if we'll have anymore, or jokes about it, and we say we're done, we've never gotten a negative response or encouraged to go for more.  I think that is the norm too, thank goodness.  I'd be on a soapbox too often if I was around such ignorance as the Dugers...lol  They may be some amazing example of success in that area but 99% of other families that big are up to their necks in problems.

[RandyWayne]

Randy I've never heard that said_ever.  That's kind of a whacko thought IMO. 

I'd love to have 4 kids, but it's not financially responsible.  We started our family early, have 2 kids that are almost 4 years apart and we are done.  When asked if we'll have anymore, or jokes about it, and we say we're done, we've never gotten a negative response or encouraged to go for more.  I think that is the norm too, thank goodness.  I'd be on a soapbox too often if I was around such ignorance as the Dugers...lol  They may be some amazing example of success in that area but 99% of other families that big are up to their necks in problems.

This was an area in Southern WI (but North of Madison) where there were quite a few large families of 9 kids or more.  Another irritating (to me) thing that most had in common with each other AND the Duggers is their tendency to name every kid with the same first initial.  It is like nails on a chalk board to me when I hear of people doing this!

[nicolejoy]

Ooohhh me too!! (sorry to anyone who did that!!)

It's ok if there's just 2 kids - but if there's TWENTY of them with the same initial? So many of the Duggar's kids names are so similar sounding - I'd be confused if I were them!! (they have a Joy-Anna and a Johannah, for example

Our first girl is called Lana and I've already ruled out names that sound too similar for our next girl. I'd never name another daughter Anna for example, even though I love the name, because it's tooooo much the same...