POlice jokes

[Sis]

Since we have an officer on board, we can have a whole thread just for POlice jokes. LOL The emphasis on the first syllable makes me laugh.

Things not to say to a police officer

*Hey, you must have been doin' at least 125 MPH to keep up with me!
*Sorry, officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
*I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
*Excuse me, is Stuck-up hyphenated?
*You know, I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

*I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, Yes, I know there is no other car around, that's how far I am behind the other cars.
*Bad cop! No donut!

[Roscoe]

  Ohh.... Sis, if I hadn't got shut down by the boss for attempting to extort baked goodies in the sharing thread, I'd be fining you for this!

[Sis]

OH?


* You're NOT going to check the trunk, are you?
*Let's do it differently this time... I will give you the breathalizer (SP)
*Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on COPS last week?
*I bet I could grab that gun before you finish writing the ticket!
*So, you "on the take?"
*Gee officer, that's terrific. The police officer yesterday only gave me a warning, too!

[1way]

I love these! I will have to share them with my husband, he is a cop as well!

[Sis]

A local policeman had just finished his shift one cold November evening and was at home with his wife.

"You just won't believe what happened this evening , in all my years on the force I've never seen anything like it."

"Oh yes dear, what happened ?"

"I came across two guys down by the canal, one of them was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks."

"Drinking battery acid and eating fireworks!! What did you do with them ?"

"Oh that was easy, I charged one and let the other off."