Wedding Traditions

[(R.I.P.) YooperYankDude]

I told the guys I plan to use when/ if I get married, that they get to dress up as secret agents, and have paintball guns, and if there is anyone who is arguing or causing trouble, they get to shoot them... three paint marks, and your done! (I have a messed up family... and there are folks that always seem to fight... I don't want them ruining the day by fighting with each other...)

Oooo.... .... I like that idea. May I borrow it?  :grin:

You betcha... can I be one of the agents? LOL

[iridiscente]

How much say does a groom have in the wedding planning?
As much as the bride, and twice as much as the bride's mother.

:hands over mouth:

hehe, i loved this answer too! (but i dont think i will have a problem with it as much as some of my friends... lol, but that goes for ALL of the Bride's extended family and friends and acquaintances as well!)

help is good.

forceful help is bad.

We've got the best mama in the world!

[iridiscente]

What about using the wedding march or a song that is more meaningful to you?

[RainbowJingles]

I like the (I think it's) Jewish tradition where the groom goes to get the bride instead of the bride meeting him at the end of the aisle.

Since the bride is a type of the church, and it seems that Scripture points to Christ *coming* for His bride, it seems more of a type/shadow to have the groom go to the bride somehow instead of vice-versa.

I've pondered it before...  the men on the platform, as "tradition" seems to dictate...

The wedding march (or whatever music) begins.
The audience rises.
The doors open.
The groom leaves the platform and walks toward the back of the church...

Dunno how it would play out.  I just like the concept.

[sunlight]

I like the (I think it's) Jewish tradition where the groom goes to get the bride instead of the bride meeting him at the end of the aisle.

Since the bride is a type of the church, and it seems that Scripture points to Christ *coming* for His bride, it seems more of a type/shadow to have the groom go to the bride somehow instead of vice-versa.

I've pondered it before...  the men on the platform, as "tradition" seems to dictate...

The wedding march (or whatever music) begins.
The audience rises.
The doors open.
The groom leaves the platform and walks toward the back of the church...

Dunno how it would play out.  I just like the concept.

ohhhhh neatoooooooo.... :like:

[upcchris]

In ancient Egypt, when the father of the bride gave his daughter to the groom, dad would give his daughter's sandles to the groom to show that she now belonged to him. In later Anglo Saxon times, the groom would tap the heel of the bride's shoe to show his authority over her. Later on, somehow this shoe fixation evolved into people throwing shoes at the couple...eventually turning into the tradition of tying shoes to the bumper of the couple's car for good luck.

Giving gifts dates from the 1890's when once a friend of a bride placed small gifts inside a Japanese parasol, opened it and let all the presents "shower" over the bride's head. When this was reported in the fashion pages, it became an overnight tradition Thus, the "shower" as we know it was born.

In ancient Greece, Spartan soldiers first held "Stag Parties". The groom would be the guest for a feast with all his male friends on the night before the wedding...thus saying goodbye to the carefree days of being a bachelor. He would also swear continued allegiance to his comrades

Diamond engagement rings were popular with medieval Italians (1400's)
as they believed that the diamond was created from the "flames of Love".
Ancient Greeks believed the diamond reflected the flame of love, thinking them to be the teardrops of the gods.
Romans believed diamonds to have romantic powers, believing them to be spinters of falling stars that once tipped the arrows of Eros, the god of love.
In the Middle Ages the power to bring together estranged marriage partners was attributed to diamonds.
Rings were used in marriages in ancient Rome but were most likely made of iron, as it would be extremely bad luck if your ring should be of weak material and break.

In ancient times it was believed that the third finger of the hand had a vein that went directly to the heart. That finger being the best place to wear a ring that symbolized love.

The engagement ring represents the promise of the couple's future, sealed with the giving and accepting of a ring.
The diamond became the symbol of betrothal as its clarity and brilliance was believed to represent innocence and purity, and its strength signifying the hope of an enduring love.

When marriages were arranged by family members, the newlyweds very rarely were allowed to see one another. Family members exchanging a dowry were afraid that if the Groom didn't like the appearance of the Bride's face, he might refuse to marry her. This is why the Father of the Bride "gave the Bride away" to the Groom at the actual wedding ceremony. Only after lifting her veil just prior to the ceremony did the Groom see the Bride's face for the first time! Early Greek and Roman Brides wore red or yellow veils to represent fire, and to ward off demons.

Aside from being an alternative to the garter toss in medieval times, the carrying of flowers by the bride also came from ancient times when it was believed that strong herbs and spices carried by the bride would keep away evil spirits, bad luck and ill health.
In Roman times, the bride and groom wore floral garlands that meant new life and hope for fertility. The bouquet later signified the full bloom of womanhood.

In the 19th century, each flower had it's own meaning and different flowers were sent back and forth as messages between the bride and groom before the wedding, each flower having a special meaning and association.

Later, the flowers used for such messages were adapted into the bride's bouquet and are sometimes used by brides today.
Traditionally, the bride's bouquet is made of white flowers and have fillers such as ferns and baby's breath to give a touch of green.

[upcchris]

The bride's bridal party goes back to ancient times, the Romans dressing the bridesmaids in dresses similar to the bride's to confuse evil spirits that might kidnap the bride.

In medieval times bridesmaids also fought off unwelcome suitors, protecting the bride for her groom.

By believing that newlyweds brought good luck, guests used to shower them with nuts and grains to insure a bountiful harvest, and many children to work the land. During years of a poor harvest, rice was tossed instead. This tradition continues today with rice or birdseed (where permitted), or bubbles to wish the Bride and Groom much happiness. Incidentally, it is not true that birds eating rice thrown after a wedding ceremony will cause their stomachs to enlarge and eventually explode. This myth may have simply evolved from church and synagogue employees weary from cleaning up after every wedding ceremony!

Something old, something new,something borrowed, something blue,and a lucky (silver) sixpence for your (her) shoe"
(from the late 19th century)
First cited in 1659 and mentioned in an 1883 newspaper article, "something old" was supposed to protect the baby born of the marriage. Today it is supposed to represent a link to the bride's family and the past. Some brides choose to wear a piece of family jewelry or a wedding gown worn by their mother or grandmother.
"Something new" (also quoted in the 1883 article) has no citations before then but represents good fortune, success, and a bright future. The wedding gown is usually chosen as the new item.
"Something borrowed" (1883 article) is supposed to be lucky for the bride and is meant to remind the bride that family and friends will be there for her when help is needed. It was especially lucky to borrow something worn by a bride from a previous wedding. ( I read elsewhere that it should be from a happily married woman)
"Something blue" (1883 article) is usually the garter, and the blue color represents faithfulness and loyalty.Blue also denotes purity.
"and a lucky (silver)sixpence for (in) your (her) shoe." wishes the bride wealth in the marriage. There is a 1774 record of a Scottish groom using a sixpence in his shoe to ward off evil from his rival and in 1814 there is a citation of a bride "wearing a piece of silver in one of her shoes" to protect her from evil from disappointed suitors.

THE FIRST KISS at the initiation of the engagement and after the completion of the ceremony dates back to Roman times where the kiss represented a legal contract

The Month You Marry

January
Mary when the year is new, he'll be loving, kind and true.

February
When February birds do mate, you wed nor dread your fate.

March
If you wed when March winds blow, joy and sorrow both you'll know.

April
Marry in April if you can, joy for maiden and for man.

May
Marry in the month of May, you will surely rue the day.

June
Marry when June roses grow and over land and sea you'll go.

July
Those who in July do wed must labor for their daily bread.

August
Whoever wed in August be, many a change is sure to see.

September
Marry in September's shine so that you life is rich and fine.

October
If in October you do marry, love will come but riches tarry.

November
If you wed in bleak November, only joys will come, remember!

December
When December's snows fall fast, marry and your love will last

Marry on Monday for health.
Tuesday for wealth.
Wednesday the best day of all.
Thursday for crosses.
Friday for losses.
And Saturday for no luck at all.

A bride apparently is very lucky - and guests would try for bits of her dess or her garter to get some of that good luck, the tradition went if a single bloke got the bride's garter and gave it to the girl he loved, she'd always be true. So in order to prevent the bride from getting turned upside down at the altar by over-eager wedding guests, the bride tosses the bouquest and the groom tosses the garter to distract the guests and to keep the bride's dress intact.

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Apologies, when a topic interests me, I do a lot of research....alternatively I do a lot of research when I'm bored.

[(R.I.P.) YooperYankDude]

Apologies, when a topic interests me, I do a lot of research....alternatively I do a lot of research when I'm bored.

I am glad someone else is like this besides me... lol. I just didn't post all the findings yet, and it looks as though I may not have too... your doing a great job!

[1legRooster]

The wedding march (or whatever music) begins.
The audience rises.
The doors open.
The groom leaves the church...

Raimbow, that does not sound encouraging. 

I had two friends getting married.  We told the bride if she changed her mind we would drive the get away car.  Told the groom if he changed his mind we would make sure the ushers had shotguns.  He would not be getting very far.  LOL

[SippinTea]

You betcha... can I be one of the agents? LOL

Deal. Provided Grandma _____ is first on your list. *cough*

[RainbowJingles]

From Chris' research:
In the 19th century, each flower had it's own meaning and different flowers were sent back and forth as messages between the bride and groom before the wedding, each flower having a special meaning and association.
I like that!  My brother sent his bride notes (and perhaps small gifts) during the hours before the wedding ceremony.  He had apparently spent a lot of time in planning and preparing these things ahead of time.  But flowers of different kinds, with special messages derived from the flowers meanings would be really awesome!  :-)

Jonathan:
lol  You're right.  That *doesn't* sound promising whatsoever. 

[nwlife]

Hmm...the tradition of the "lucky guy" who catches the garter giving it to the girl he loved so that she would always be true.   

Since I have caught the garter (when being present at the actual throwing) at every wedding for the last 7 or so weddings I have attended....and Not givning them to anyone, (except one crying little kid who was mad that he didn't get it), may well explain why I am still single..  Well, better not break that tradition!!!!!

[upcchris]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

[Sis]

Thanx for all the info. Interesting!

[nwlife]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark? 

[upcchris]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark? 

I think I'm more like the little fish that swims alongside and doesn't get involved.

[nwlife]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark? 

I think I'm more like the little fish that swims alongside and doesn't get involved.

Watch out guys, she's the one that just waits for a sneak attack!!!!!

[Newsman]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark? 

I think I'm more like the little fish that swims alongside and doesn't get involved.

Watch out guys, she's the one that just waits for a sneak attack (I hope!)!!!!!

[(R.I.P.) YooperYankDude]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark? 

I think I'm more like the little fish that swims alongside and doesn't get involved.

Watch out guys, she's the one that just waits for a sneak attack (I hope!)!!!!!

Lots of carnivores are like that though... 

[RandyWayne]

K... So been pondering for the last 26 yrs (yes I was a avid ponderer at a early age... things like why is my sippy cup blue instead of red? Why Pampers? Do I have to kiss my little sister in this picture for Oma? What is a Oma? Where did my did little sister come from? Where's daddy?)  Lol...

Why are the wedding traditions that we have, the ones we have?

Are all wedding traditions good?
No!

How big should a wedding be?
As SMALL as you want.

How much should someone spend?
It isn't the budget so much as how wisely it is spent.

Should they go into debt for one?
A LITTLE debt is ok.

Should they go into debt for a honeymoon?
See above

Which church should host the wedding?
Mmmmmm.....  I personal preference:  NO Church.  The MGM Grand in Vegas is MUCH better!

Does it have to be held inside a church?
See above

How much say does a groom have in the wedding planning?
Should be 50% but is usually 5%.....  Any episode of Bridezilla with confirm this.

Is a dress other than white bad?
Nope

Why White? (Hint: The color of purity has not always been white!)

What about the food, does it have to be catered or can it be something else?
Catered!!  Do not!  I repeat, do NOT go with the pot luck!!!

What about dancing at the reception?
Absolutely!!

And a plethora of others that I may post as this one takes off, should anyone decide to comment...  


I have come to my own conclusion on these and more over the last 26 years... among others... but curious as to what everyone else has to say about it. And since not everyone on here is single, I though some insight from the married people would be of value as well...  

[upcchris]

LOL 'Jaws' theme for a coming down the aisle song

Hmm, I made a comment in another thread likening single ladies to sharks

So does that mean when you are eyeing over the guys, that your comparrison is a tiger shark, or the great white shark?  

I think I'm more like the little fish that swims alongside and doesn't get involved.

Watch out guys, she's the one that just waits for a sneak attack (I hope!)!!!!!

Lots of carnivores are like that though...  

BOL! Guys! *shakes head*....I'm more like the girl on the sidelines watching the ladies circle their prey with a mixture of exasperation and bemusement....I'm the girl with too many issues to get involved and fly with the vultures. I don't do confrontational stuff like that...God is the only one who says who my mate is. I don't need to be asked 'who do you like...who do you think is cute' *gag* as if that was all that mattered! God casts the deciding vote...He is the only one who knows who my other half is...I'm not gonna go after a bloke who's not my intended...so I don't go after blokes at all...the ball's always in their court...in the meantime....I'm just a sympathetic ear and a good listener....and a good friend....if you don't count the fact that I'm not good at keeping in touch....I've lost touch with most of them   

[sunlight]

:grin:

* sunlight hugs Chris

That was a great post! I totally agree!

[upcchris]

Aww thanks Sunlight. *HUGS*

[(R.I.P.) YooperYankDude]

:grin:

* sunlight hugs Chris

That was a great post! I totally agree!

I second that... 

[SippinTea]

Tee hee. Good post. And I'm right with ya. I'm generally the shoulder they cry on when they're upset about a certain gal not paying them any attention.