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Musing the Muddles

Started by SippinTea, April 01, 2008, 03:00:52 PM

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SippinTea

This morning I'm musing through some of life's muddles. Life takes such abrupt twists and turns sometimes, and then at other times it seems to go forever in the rut of my own choosing.

Last week I got out of my rut by doing a very irresponsible thing (or was it?). Took two extra days off work, for no good reason at all (or was it?)... and spent a wonderful few days with Titushome's family.

It never ceases to amaze me how much stress falls away while you're holding a sleeping baby. And is there anything more delightful than a baby's smile and chortle?

Musing about how wonderful it is to sip tea with a good friend while you're curled up on the couch, chatting about everything and nothing.

God is good to give us friends, and babies, and tea, and safe trips over the mountain passes.

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

MelodyB

Have you slapped that one dude from Indiana with a pie in the face today?
 

SippinTea

This was written for my blog (not GP) so you already know about Indy, but here's a little more of the story...

It may sound overly dramatic to say I'm making a break for freedom, but I kind of think that's what I'm doing. And my big resignation from ministry involvement was only the beginning. Somewhere in the muddle of my life, I think I forgot who it was God created me to be. Or maybe I never entirely knew, and maybe I'm just now starting to see glimpses. Or maybe I just focus too much on the annoying parts of my confusing personality, and I'm learning to see some positives and re-learning how to have fun.

My first big clue that I'd been missing something was last summer at the church campout when Bro Dale brought his boat and inner tube to the lake. I always feel so responsible to make sure things go well, and everyone has a good time, and everyone feels included, and.... Sometimes I don't have much fun in the process. I'd watched the kids have fun being towed around the lake, screaming and laughing, and coming back to camp completely soaked, but with the biggest smiles on their faces, and giddy with excitement. Several people had asked me if I was going to go in the inner tube (but especially Nikki, who said if I'd go, she would), and I kept saying 'no'. But the more I watched them, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized there was no good reason for me to stay and be 'responsible'. Why shouldn't I be a kid for an hour? And why shouldn't I have fun with a friend of my own? And what would it hurt if I got soaked from head to toe? I had other clothes to change into. Sooo... I went.

Bro Dale helped Nikki and I get situated in the tube, and promised he wouldn't get too carried away since he knows I can't swim. I did have a life jacket on, but I knew if I ended up in the water, I'd panic—badly.  He started out slowly, but kept gaining speed as Nikki and I hung on tighter and tighter. We both had big grins on our faces, and every time a wave of water came over the edge and soaked us, we'd scream. Bro Dale seemed pleased with the results, and decided to step it up a notch. Before I knew it we were zooming through the water, doing zigzag motions, careening around corners, bumping and bouncing over the waves from the other boats in the water, and Nikki and I were laughing ourselves silly. By this point we were so wet, it was impossible to get any wetter, but the water was so cold we'd scream every time it hit us.

Long story short, I screamed so much I made myself hoarse, I laughed so much my sides hurt for several days (no joke!), and I couldn't even remember the last time I'd had that much fun.

The second big clue was when Trent came home for Christmas. He randomly decided to take me to Toomie's one Sunday night after church, because his former guitar teacher's band was playing live jazz. I almost never do things like that when he's not here. I generally figure it's not worth spending the money. But really now... does an appetizer and a cup of tea cost all that much for a relaxing evening? Of course, the largest part of my fun was being with Trent, but I love good jazz, and there's no reason I couldn't invite someone else to go with me sometime.

And then Leo came to Oregon as well. Sitting up late chatting with Trent and Leo reminded me of how much I miss having other young adults around to talk about life with, and discuss Scripture, and laugh at silly jokes.

But the day the three of us went cross-country skiing was a day I'll never forget. Leo had never been cross-country skiing before, and it had been a long time since Trent and I were on skis, so the three of us spent as much time with our faces in snow banks as we did standing upright. And yet again, I found myself laughing harder than I had in a very long time.

Why is it so hard for me to lighten up and just enjoy being? Why is it so difficult for me to allow myself to put time and energy into fun things? Life isn't all about work and duties and responsibilities.

The third thing came as yet another shock to me. I flew to Indiana for Musicfest, expecting to put my time and brain to hard use in the classes, and perhaps have a few minutes here and there with the friends I knew were going too.

But God knew I needed the fellowship more than I needed the musical training. And I found myself intentionally skipping a class to buy myself extra time with a group of friends. Even more surprising, I stayed up until 3 a.m. chatting and laughing with them. I'm not sure when the last time was that I was up at that hour. Yes, I came home exhausted. But it was a good exhausted, not the mental fatigue that is so hard to deal with. And the memories and friendships I came away with were worth more than money could buy.

Was I surprised at myself in some of these situations? Yes. If I had it to do over, would I play it safe and stay out of the inner tube? Go to bed instead of staying up listening to jazz? Stay home instead of risking a twisted ankle on the mountainside? Diligently go to class, and head for bed at a decent hour rather than enjoy being with friends? Never!

Not really sure where these discoveries are taking me. I guess time will tell. But in the meantime, I'm enjoying the journey.


:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

sunlight

YES! too cool! yipee!
* sunlight is REALLY glad! for more than one reason!
  :attackhug: Be full of hugs!

The Purple Fuzzy


MelodyB

*Tight HUG*

Yeah. I am VERY proud of you for that...all of it. ;)
Have you slapped that one dude from Indiana with a pie in the face today?
 

SippinTea

*Hugs* Chel, Sandra, and Melody

Thanks. :)

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

SippinTea

Random (or not so random) Scriptures and thoughts:

I Kings 19:18--"Yet I have left me seven thousand in Israel, all the knees which have not bowed unto Baal, and every mouth which hath not kissed him."

You are more than able to preserve people who are dedicated to You.

Matt 21:21-22--"Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do this which is done to the fig tree, but also if ye shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; it shall be done. And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."

I believe You, Jesus. I'm asking in faith, and trusting that You will fulfill your promise.

Psalm 84:11--"For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly."

If what I have prayed for is within your will for my life, and would be good for me, then I know it will come to pass. If it does not come to pass, then I will trust in the fact that You know what is best in my life, because You see the whole picture. I'm so thankful I can rest in that.

Jer. 29:11-12--"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end. Then shall ye call upon me, and ye shall go and pray unto me, and I will hearken unto you."

I know that You hear me, I know that You care, I know that Your plans for me are only for good, and never to harm or hurt.

Heb 6:15--"And so, after he [Abraham] had patiently endured, he obtained the promise."

Jesus, I am waiting with patient expectance to see how Your promise will be fulfilled.

Heb 10:23--"Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for he is faithful that promised;)"

Holding tight to Your hand, Jesus. Holding onto hope.

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

sunlight

* sunlight hugs Ruby in a tight Chel hug
  :attackhug: Be full of hugs!

iridiscente

We think a lot alike.
That's not meant to be a put-down!

SippinTea

*Hugs* Dina and Chel

You're both really sweet. :)

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

iridiscente

Same title, different letters:
Musing the Muddles
Perusing the Puddles
Choosing the Cuddles
Losing the Love Handles
Bruising the Befuddles
Oozing the Oodles

ok. enough.
Your title was inspiring, that's all.

SippinTea

"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

sunlight

I love my sister! lol.
* sunlight hugs Ruby and Dina
  :attackhug: Be full of hugs!

Nerd

Awesome, Ruby!  :thumbsup2:


How 'bout "Paddling the poodles"?

:grin:

MelodyB

Quote from: coolguy on May 03, 2008, 04:29:19 PM

How 'bout "Paddling the poodles"?

:grin:


Thats a title for Brandon. LOL
Have you slapped that one dude from Indiana with a pie in the face today?
 

SippinTea

Quote from: coolguy on May 03, 2008, 04:29:19 PM
Awesome, Ruby!  :thumbsup2:


How 'bout "Paddling the poodles"?

:grin:

Thank you, thank you! And I'll cheerfully paddle any poodle within reach. ;)

Quote from: iridiscente on May 03, 2008, 03:07:59 AM
Choosing the Cuddles

Hmmm... how 'bout I borrow this one for the title of my next thread, when this one is at 20 pages? *grin*

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

iridiscente


SippinTea

 :searching: Who posted that anyhow?

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

SippinTea

Discoveries about giants... and about myself:

I think we probably all have a giant in our lives. You know... One of those things that seem so huge, so enormous, that we think we can never get past them. Those things that keep us awake at night. Those things we are afraid to even look in the face.

Giants come in many forms, but they all have the same goal: to paralyze their prey with fear.

Almost exactly a year ago I decided I was tired of living in fear of the giant in front of me, tired of standing still and watching it take things that were precious to me. I was fed up with feeling completely helpless, fed up with the taunts the giant threw in my face every day, fed up with my own cowering before them.

I declared war.

In the face of the taunts, I reminded him that Jesus' blood is more than enough to cover even my worst mistakes and bad choices. When the giant caused nightmares that made me wake in the night shaking and in tears, I quoted verses in its face until my heartbeat returned to normal and I was peaceful enough to sleep once again. When the giant tried to come between me and relationships that were important to me, I pushed past it to the people that I loved and that loved me. When the giant tried to tell me I wasn't worth anything, I pointed out that Jesus thought I was worth enough to die for.

To my shock, I saw the giant begin to falter.

My declaration of war began as a timidly whispered verse or two, that I wasn't even certain the giant could hear, but when I realized that the giant couldn't stand against the strength that lives inside me (I John 4:4), I grew bolder in my declarations.

The last number of months have been open warfare between us, and while I haven't won every battle, I already know who the victor of the war is.

I've seen the giant take a death-blow. He may still be on his feet, but the stone is sunk in deep. And it's only a matter of time until he lies on the ground.

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

RainbowJingles

And then you'll go grab his sword and CHOP OFF HIS HEAD!!!!  :hyper:

sunlight

YES! ALRIGHTY! YAY! AMAZING!
* sunlight hugs Ruby tight...
i have a giant too.... and you are so right!
  :attackhug: Be full of hugs!

MelodyB

I still cant believe that it has been almost exactly one year. *sigh* WOW.

This reminds me of that song, you remember? I know Mary will... :sing: Giants, do die, the bigger they are, the harder they fall.... :sing:


Thanks Ruby, once again, you have spoken the true feelings that are in MY heart as well, but you are much better about knowing how to put them into words. I am so blessed to have you in my life, and so thankful that God saw fit to put you there to help me defeat MY giant.

*TIGHT HUG*
Have you slapped that one dude from Indiana with a pie in the face today?
 

SippinTea

I'm currently reading through Crazy Love by Francis Chan, and finding such encouraging and thought provoking things in it!

Here are a few quotes from the book that I think you may like:

"Isn't it a comfort to worship a God we cannot exaggerate?"

"As much as we want God to explain Himself to us, His creation, we are in no place to demand that He give an account to us."

"When I am consumed by my problems-stressed out about MY life, MY family, and MY job-I actually convey the belief that I think the circumstances are more important than God's command to always rejoice. In other words, that I have a 'right' to disobey God because of the magnitude of my responsibilities."

"The point of your life is to point to Him."

"All that matters is the reality of who we are before God."

:beret:
"Not everything that is of God is easy." -Elona

"When you're wildly in love with someone, it changes everything." -F. Chan

"A real live hug anytime you want it is priceless." -Rachel

MelodyB

And you already know which one of those fits ME. :great: ;)
Have you slapped that one dude from Indiana with a pie in the face today?